Spill

Why I don’t care about the strike

As a self-proclaimed television aficionado, you’d think I’d be more upset about the writers strike.  Let’s face it, aside from the So You Think You Can Dance fetish, I’m pretty much only interested in scripted television.  I should be crying my eyes out.  But while I’m following the strike coverage religiously (Deadline Hollywood Daily, dudes), I’m perfectly content to miss out on the 2008 season.  Doesn’t bother me at all.  So what’s going on here?

1. A really weak pilot season.  None of the year’s new shows were particularly thrilling.  The only ones I still watch regularly are Dirty Sexy Money and Pushing Daisies, and I sort of want to love those shows more than I actually do, you know?  I loved Mad Men, but it finished its run mid-fall.  My parents adore The Big Bang Theory.  It’s cute, but I don’t need to watch it every week.  They’re more into it, I decided, because they don’t know any super geeks.  I do, so watching fictional geeks is considerably less thrilling.  So, yeah.  Big yawn to the new shows.  And I have extremely low expectations for the ones yet to air (The Sarah Connor Chronicles, Cashmere Mafia, whatever).

2. No exciting cliffhangers.  As for the other shows I watch, I’m happy to press the pause button on their current plotlines.  In previous years, I was into heavily serialized shows like Veronica Mars, Alias and Lost.  I would’ve been irate if the networks put Logan in jail or left Vaughn caught in the throes of some Rambaldi device and then left me hanging for months on end.  But this year, I don’t really have a must-see heart-pounding drama.  I love Friday Night Lights, but c’mon, it’s just football.  Heroes is the only show around with life-or-death stakes, and I hate to point this out to you, but Heroes is mediocre.  It’s exciting occasionally, and some of the people are pretty, but it’s never awesome.  So, yeah, Heroes going off the air for months?  I’ll survive.

As for the softer dramas — Grey’s Anatomy, Ugly Betty — no big cliffhangers there either.  Sure, McDreamy is flirting with the new nurse, but we the viewers know a stupid plot twist when we see one.  It’s not like Meredith has her hand stuck in Bomb Guy’s chest.  Now there’s a cliffhanger!  Honestly, I don’t think I’ll ever be as emotionally involved with Grey’s Anatomy again, even if they taped Christina to the front of a speeding train or something.  You can’t top Bomb Guy.  It’s fourth season, the show’s peaked.  It’s all downhill from here.

There’s nothing crazy going on with the half-hour comedy romantic subplots, either — and that’s the Catch-22 with comedies.  They’re more accessible to viewers, but people won’t skip happy hour to go home and watch except in two situations: the show’s attained cult social status, or some folks on the show are about to make out.  Romantic tension is key.  For example, 30 Rock is my favorite show.  I’m obsessed.  But I’m willing to DVR it.  Last season, DVR was unacceptable; I had to watch in real time — because Floyd and Liz were going to hook up.  Same thing with Jim and Pam on The Office: they’re together now, so we can all take a deep breath and relax.  I can even relax all the way to 2009.  As long as I’m assured these shows will come back eventually, I’m happy.

3. College basketball.  I mostly watch ACC games during the regular, and this means I’m woefully underinformed when March Madness rolls around.  When it comes to the Big East, I’ll end up picking teams with stupid mascot names for my bracket, crap like that.  Because normally I’m watching too much TV already to have time for SportsCenter — but this year, there won’t be any good TV to get in the way!  It’s all college hoops all the time, baby!  (Apologies for channeling Dickie V.)

4.  The writers are right.  

5.  The Wire.  I’ve never seen it!  I’m going to rent it!  I’m pretty excited about it!

I watched the return of the late shows last night — loved that Conan seemed to play by the rules; while clearly there was planning about what went on the air, it didn’t seem as “written” as the Leno material did.  And Dave was fantastic, continuing to publicize the writers strike while keeping the material hilarious.  Hey, I guess that’s what professional writers are good for!